Nerves of Steel, or Power of the Ocean

Every time you do something for the first time it is scary, nerve-wracking, to the extent that you may just quit before you even begin. This is how I feel about blogging. So I have quit many times before I even started. There are lots of little things in my life that have inspired or pushed me to do something new, and this weeks inspiration has been reading a particular autobiography. I'm grateful for others that share their stories, for having a voice when many people can't find their own, it connects people together.

So please bare with me will I find the words...

This blog will be different things, a place to share CircusFit news, events & discoveries, and also to share thoughts and experiences. I am out of my comfort zone on a daily basis, so much so that my habit or "comfort" zone could be that that of discomfort!

Truth is I need creature comforts like every one else and am turning my energy and attention to creating something a little more comfortable. I have been studying for my 200 hours Vinyasa Yoga with the Aditya Yoga School, and this weekend's module was all about Water.

The Aditya School teachings are based on the 5 elements: Earth, Water, Fire, Air & Ether. We are all made up of a combination of these elements. Water makes up 70% of the earths surface and 70% of our bodies! Some people are more Water than others, in their personalities, their physicalities, their lifestyles. Water is connecting, it blends with everything, it is fluid and ever changing in shape, adapting to its environment. In yoga Water also means beauty, sensuality, femininity, vulnerability and a Water themed Vinyasa class will use the transverse and lateral movement planes, not just the frontal plane.

Me and my fellow students had an emotional time this weekend. There are a few other mums on the course who feel buried under their responsibilities and have lost a sense of themselves, there are other women whose careers have taken all the joy and fun out of their lives, and others who want to make changes in their lives but are stuck. These blocks are manifested in our bodies, mine especially.

Hip-opening poses are about allowing Water back into the body, and my body resists these, to the point that I was crying tears of pain, or surrender, or of relief when finally giving up and releasing into a posture that I was resisting. My guru says that I have too much Fire, that I have taken on a very masculine persona and I have to let the feminine in. So I am trying to use this guidance and ease off from this idea that I always have to be strong, or that I always have to fight. Rather than nerves of steel, I think I'd like to have the strength of a river, or better yet an ocean. I'd like to give my nerves a rest, and move with the eb and flow of the tide :-)

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